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Category: Things That Made Me Gay

Rags to Riches to Gay

It was Annie, if there were five Annies (six in the premiere). It was Glee, in the 60s. It was Rags to Riches, and it ran on NBC for two glorious seasons in the late 80s. Every Sunday night, you’d find me and my brother and sister glued to the TV watching – and recording it on VHS to watch the episodes over and over again. A Beverly Hills millionaire named Nick Foley adopts a handful of orphan girls to rehabilitate his image, and they sing… about everything… all the time.

But Rob, you might be asking, its all girls. How did this make you gay? Was it simply because of the presence of the iconic Tisha Campbell of Little Shop of Horrors fame? You’d think so, but no. For me, it was the beautiful blonde Diane, played perfectly by Bridget Michele. Every gay boy finds a diva to fall in love with and for me, it was her. She was, simply, stunning, and absolutely heart-wrenching for ten-year-old me as I watched her quest for love and get her heart broken.

That resonated. At the time, my heart was being broken nearly daily. I was only ten, eleven, twelve, but I had already mastered the dramatics of the adolescent gay. Ironically, or perhaps just not-so-coincidentally, the girl in charge of breaking my heart consistently at the time was also a sparkling blonde (shout out to Cori!).

Diane Foley collected many a man in the short run of the show, including the handsome lifeguard Sean played by Ken Olandt, and the Duke, played by Sasha Mitchell shown below, long before his time on Step by Step or the spousal abuse that followed.

I’m a sucker for a handsome face, as much now as I apparently was in the fall of 1987, but even still, I’m not sure it was Diane’s teenager in love that pushed me towards the closet door. Sure, my fascination with her bevy of beautiful beaus definitely should have been an inkling that I was not like other boys. But I think the part of Rags to Riches that really made me a big old gay was the musical numbers. These weren’t Broadway ballads like tomorrow. These were huge pop hits of the 50s and 60s, often with lyrics changed to suit the plot. They were catchy and costumed and choreographed.

Angst? Check. Drama? Check. Hot men? Double check. Add on show-stopping performances, and this show was a recipe for delight for a small prairies gay boy like me.

Do you remember this show? What media made you gay? Do you understand why Diane’s fashion was giving 80s realness in a show set in 1963? Chime in, in the comments.

Iron in his Thighs, indeed

No one is groomed into being gay… but there’s definitely some media moments that can nudge a gay kid out of the closet. This new series deep dives into a few of those for me.

The Mighty Hercules was an animated kids show from the early 60s that ran for 128 episodes. Each episode was only a few minutes, and I think they got tacked on to the end of other kids’ shows in the 80s as an extra mini-adventure. I can almost see myself sitting there cross-legged, dangerously close to a TV with rabbit ears, bowl of Fruit Loops in my lap, entranced by the mythological adaptation before me.

Well, by that and by Herc’s physique. This has to have been my earliest encounter with “the gay gaze”. Years later, in Florence, I stood there looking at Michaelangelo’s David the same way younger me sat there gazing up at this man, descending from Olympus, the wind blowing up his tunic to reveal not only those massive thighs, but just a hint more side butt than was probably appropriate.

It could have been the stories that kept me watching, because I loved Greek myths even before I borrowed D’aulaires Greek Myths from my school library and kept it for weeks, until the librarian actively hunted me down to get me to return it. No, I suspect there was another reason that had me gazing up at my screen like Newton gazing up at his demigod friend.

Hercules? More like Hunkules.

There was a strength and a masculinity there that resonated inside me. It was something missing from the 90s Disney version. It was the first time I probably began to grapple with the issue common to so many gay boys: is this something I yearn to be, or just someone I yearn to be with? And even now, many many moons later, that’s a question I sometimes grapple with. I know who I am now, and am mostly comfortable in my own skin, but a muscular thigh and a well-formed pectoral? I’m glad (I’m glad) to have (to have) a friend like that

Did you watch this show? Did your heart flutter like Hercules’ tunic? Chime in, in the comments.